I lost my oldest son this weekend. I have 5 kids and my oldest son, 22 years old, lost his multi year battle to depression this weekend.
I've been a long time CP member and while I don't post a lot, I've been here for a long time.
I post here for a simple reason... Love those in your life that you have the opportunity to love. Whether it is you kid, parent, sibling or close friend. Love them.
I never missed the opportunity to tell my son he was loved, hugging him and having part of our regular life. But from here on out, I will never have that opportunity again.
He leaves behind 4 siblings who are wrecked by this - brothers aged 20, 15 & 13, and a sister who adored him age 10.
We all will get through this, but I can attest that the pain that is felt through this has no words in any language that accurately depict the pain.
So sorry for your loss, Dave. We lost my 17 year old brother in law to suicide. At the end of this month it'll have been 3 years ago. We would see him quite often and we had absolutely no idea that he was even depressed.
It seems like now I hear about losing someone young to suicide at such an alarming rate. Less than a year after my BIL my wife's boss lost her son to the same thing. He was only about 21. We had met him a couple of times and no one knew that he was even depressed.
It's so sad to even think about such young people being in such a dark, bad place in their minds that they think the only solution is to end their lives. Is the stigma around mental health so bad that they felt like they couldn't reach out for help?
We try our best to ask our oldest how she is doing and to make sure she is in a good place with her mental health, but I can tell my wife is still terrified of something happening. [Reply]
So sorry for the pain and loss your family is experiencing now. I lost a brother at 21 and a daughter at 19, each a tragedy in its on way. There's no way to express what you are going through, but this I have learned. The Spirit lives, and those lost are still with us and can be found throughout the lives we continue to live. Just be open to finding them, and you will. Above all, hold close those grieving with you and be sure you and they know that everyone grieves in their own way, just as each heals in their own time. My daughter would have been 33 this August. I am not now whole, nor do I expect to ever be again, but I am healed, because true love never dies and never stops working its magic in our lives. [Reply]
I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine what your family is going through. Thanks for sharing your story. Sometimes I get frustrated with some of my family members, and this is a good reminder to cherish every moment. [Reply]
When I was a new dad, holding my babies... I didn't even realize that the massive , life changing amount of love I was feeling was going to grow. As the years have gone by my love for my kids has only deepened. And I could not imagine losing any of them...just... can't.
I can empathize with the effects of depression and how difficult it is to manage and try to overcome. I lost a cousin a few years younger to the same and have battled it myself.
I hope that you find a way to use his memories to find joy rather than sorrow and that your children can do the same. [Reply]