Your the noob of the year! Figure it out damn.
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I vote for the first on air suicide.
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So we have 1 vote for on-air suicide.
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Find the local-est of local issues to talk about and just start droning.

Something about stoplights, or trash service.

The more detail the better.

Tell about how you left a lamp out because you got a new one at 'The Ikea' and you just don't have room for one no more, and the trash collectors STILL haven't picked it up. And it looks stupid, because the lamp sitting by the dumpster looks like someone is sitting out there reading the newspaper, and of course no one sits out by the dumpster and reads the newspaper when they have a perfectly good recliner and a brand new lamp inside where it's warm and dry.

It's been cold 'round here lately, rainy too. Don't know why it's raining so much so early in the year. Playin' heck with getting your irises planted. Anyway, could you get someone to pick up that dad blamed lamp so our block doesn't look like a hipster hangout, because the hipsters are moving in already and it's a whole thing.


You get the idea.
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Rush Limbaugh impersonation.
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Gunshot to the head while proclaiming free Daru!
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Might as well go for your avatar song.

Ask them if they would like some sausages~
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Just be yourself.
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Attention Whore of the Year Award along with n00b of the Year. Impressive!
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Make it two votes plz.
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Hopefully you can scream Chiefs Planet (not Falcons Planet) near the end of the call. This is gonna be funny!!
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Fresh Prince of Bel Air.
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"Baba booey"
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Simple.....


Ask the host of the show (and audience) if they eat ass.
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