How long did you last?
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How much did it cost?
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Why don't you just give us a 10-paragraph story/breakdown instead of fielding questions?

This is dumb and will take forever. You're a "writer".

Let's go.
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She didn't make me cum. Hence the "meh." It was a frustrating experience.

She gave a hell of a blowjob but I couldn't stay hard when I was actually fucking her. I'm guessing it had something to do with the fact that I could fit three fingers inside her vajeen. I had a little wine, but not that much.
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I was talking about downstairs, dude.
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You're going to take a ration of shit for this post, but it was just virgin anxiety. And yeah, I'm sure it sucked if you didn't get yours. Go back for seconds and you'll be lightened up enough to blow your load and form a much better opinion of the experience. She'll want more too. If she knows you didn't cum, she's feeling self conscious about it and she'll try harder the next time.
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....or that you prefer your prostate be stimulated by something that sounds like lard schmick.
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oh no. now the debate over true loss of virginity will be waged.


shoulda waited till you got married dude
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I think the ending conversation went something like this.

GC: Well thats never happened before...

HER: Which the eight seconds of sex or the 40 minutes of crying?

And yes GC has now had sex no matter how brief and unsatisfying it might have been.
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We fucked each other through various means for two and a half hours. But yeah, it was ultimately unsatisfying, but not all bad.
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You should have insisted that she cut you up and store you in the freezer, dude. It makes for a better story AND she could clean your bone every day for a month.
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I was actually thinking about that while she was riding me.

"WTF is going on here? AM I GAY?"
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You are a good friend Mr. Flopnuts.

Don't agree with anything in your post for once in my life but youre a good friend.
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Are you invited back?
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