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Hall of Classics>The Declaration Of Independence, MO - The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel
Hammock Parties 02:57 AM 07-21-2012
The Declaration Of Independence, MO


The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel


When in the course of football events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the fandom bands which have connected them with a Quarterback, and to assume among the Powers of the NFL, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Football and of the NFL's Goodell entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all Quarterbacks are not created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain Unalienable Talents, that among these are Arm Strength, Accuracy and the Pursuit of Championships.

That to secure these talents, Quarterbacks are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the Consent of the Fanbase, That whenever any Form of Quarterback becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Quarterbacks, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Attendance At Arrowhead and Hope For A Championship.

Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Quarterbacks Long Established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably The Same Offense evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to Throw Off Such Quarterbacks, and to provide new Guards (however, neither left nor right) for their Future Rooting Interests.

Such has been the patient sufferance of these Chiefs Fans; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Offense. The history of the present Quarterback is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an Absolute Run-First Offense over the State of Missouri.


To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.


Cassel 3:16


Spoiler!


Playoff Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Winning Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Lacks Deep Passing Ability


Spoiler!


Cassel Makes Offensive Linemen Worse


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Good Defenses At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Elite Quarterbacks At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!



We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of Chiefs Fans, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme GM of Arrowhead for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Chiefs, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Chiefs fans are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent of Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel.

That they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Patriot Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of New England, is and ought to be totally dissolved.

And that as Free and Independent Chiefs Fans, they have full Power to levy Boos, conclude Peace, contract Alliances with Dwayne Bowe, establish Commerce with Top Five Picks, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Fans may of right do.

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Playoff Fortunes and our Sacred Fandom.


SIGN BELOW


This post made possible by SNR, Coogs and
The Gang Of 14.
Statistics compiled by ESPN, PFF and PFR

Dedicated to 'Hamas' Jenkins, our Patrick Henry, who said "Give Me Sanchez, Or Give Me Death."









For further details, please review
The Pioli Facts.

The Declaration has been updated with statistics from 2012 and FINALIZED. Remove Matt Cassel from Kansas City. FOREVER.

[Reply]
Hammock Parties 06:17 PM 10-04-2012
Just a great screenshot, of the Mayor of Pussytown.


[Reply]
Three7s 06:24 PM 10-04-2012
When are you gonna change your name to Pioli's Reckoning, Clay?
[Reply]
Mr. Flopnuts 09:53 AM 10-05-2012
Sofa made a suggestion to stick this thread and the future Pioli thread for new visitors to be able to quickly discern why we are doing what we are doing. The mods agree that sticking this thread is a good idea on a short term basis. This is the only one we are going to stick though. An update to the thread title with an addition of the Pioli google docs would be a great idea, but I'll leave all of that up to the OP who has definitely earned the right to determine how this whole thing is advertised here. Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.


[Reply]
Ace Gunner 10:19 AM 10-05-2012
good.
[Reply]
Bearcat 10:45 AM 10-05-2012
Didn't find a good site to pull data from, but it would be interesting to see how many receivers have led the NFL in YAC for a season... Welker is the only one I could find, and he's done it twice -- in 2008 and last year -- but, espn's stats only go back to 2006, nfl.com doesn't show YAC, and a couple of other sites split it up between RB and WRs.
[Reply]
L.A. Chieffan 10:46 AM 10-05-2012
Let the voice of the REAL Fans be heard! Read my posts in this thread n00bs
[Reply]
Munson 01:00 PM 10-05-2012
It's about time this thread gets stickied! :-)
[Reply]
Tribal Warfare 01:05 PM 10-05-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
Just a great screenshot, of the Mayor of Pussytown.

Matt " Little Bitch" Cassel
[Reply]
Mr. Flopnuts 01:16 PM 10-05-2012
That picture makes my blood boil. How does that happen to a fucking so called leader? At least fake it till you make it you fucking pussy!
[Reply]
Bewbies 01:46 PM 10-05-2012
Mayor of pussytown!! Perfect...
[Reply]
Sofa King 02:27 PM 10-05-2012
Originally Posted by Mr. Flopnuts:
Sofa made a suggestion to stick this thread and the future Pioli thread for new visitors to be able to quickly discern why we are doing what we are doing. The mods agree that sticking this thread is a good idea on a short term basis. This is the only one we are going to stick though. An update to the thread title with an addition of the Pioli google docs would be a great idea, but I'll leave all of that up to the OP who has definitely earned the right to determine how this whole thing is advertised here. Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.
I'd like to thank the mods for listening to the voice of the people. Now if only Clark Hunt would do the same.
[Reply]
Titty Meat 02:34 PM 10-05-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
I've been commissioned to draft another document detailing our desire to secede from the State of Pioli in which we now live.

Anyone got suggestions for another historical document/speech with which to frame the evidence?
Yes it should be like the Warren Commission. It affirms that Pioli was the one who killed the franchise.
[Reply]
New World Order 03:49 PM 10-05-2012
It's a sticky! CR's work has finally paid off, he should demand many apologies on this board for trying to preach the good word. He is the site's savior
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 04:42 PM 10-05-2012
And you'll never have to.


[Reply]
Mr_Tomahawk 07:27 PM 10-05-2012
Originally Posted by Cassel's Reckoning:
Just a great screenshot, of the Mayor of Pussytown.

Do Daboll and Cassel practice that face or something...?
[Reply]
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