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Hall of Classics>The Declaration Of Independence, MO - The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel
Hammock Parties 02:57 AM 07-21-2012
The Declaration Of Independence, MO


The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel


When in the course of football events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the fandom bands which have connected them with a Quarterback, and to assume among the Powers of the NFL, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Football and of the NFL's Goodell entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all Quarterbacks are not created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain Unalienable Talents, that among these are Arm Strength, Accuracy and the Pursuit of Championships.

That to secure these talents, Quarterbacks are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the Consent of the Fanbase, That whenever any Form of Quarterback becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Quarterbacks, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Attendance At Arrowhead and Hope For A Championship.

Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Quarterbacks Long Established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably The Same Offense evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to Throw Off Such Quarterbacks, and to provide new Guards (however, neither left nor right) for their Future Rooting Interests.

Such has been the patient sufferance of these Chiefs Fans; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Offense. The history of the present Quarterback is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an Absolute Run-First Offense over the State of Missouri.

To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.


Cassel 3:16


Spoiler!


Playoff Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Winning Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Lacks Deep Passing Ability


Spoiler!


Cassel Makes Offensive Linemen Worse


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Good Defenses At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Elite Quarterbacks At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!



We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of Chiefs Fans, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme GM of Arrowhead for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Chiefs, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Chiefs fans are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent of Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel.

That they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Patriot Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of New England, is and ought to be totally dissolved.

And that as Free and Independent Chiefs Fans, they have full Power to levy Boos, conclude Peace, contract Alliances with Dwayne Bowe, establish Commerce with Top Five Picks, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Fans may of right do.

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Playoff Fortunes and our Sacred Fandom.


SIGN BELOW


This post made possible by SNR, Coogs and The Gang Of 14.
Statistics compiled by ESPN, PFF and PFR

Dedicated to 'Hamas' Jenkins, our Patrick Henry, who said "Give Me Sanchez, Or Give Me Death."









For further details, please review The Pioli Facts.

The Declaration has been updated with statistics from 2012 and FINALIZED. Remove Matt Cassel from Kansas City. FOREVER.

[Reply]
splatbass 08:48 PM 07-23-2012
Originally Posted by Toad King:
That has nothing to do with coaching.

It's a shitty read by Cassel. Throwing to a receiver who has a 5 percent chance of getting the 1st down is terrible.
That was the intended receiver. He never looked at anyone else. That was the call.
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 08:57 PM 07-23-2012
Originally Posted by splatbass:
That was the intended receiver. He never looked at anyone else. That was the call.
:-)

OK.

FYI, you can clearly see him looking downfield.

He's a POS.
[Reply]
Easy 6 08:59 PM 07-23-2012
You're a good kid, Matt... but not everyone gets to be the ace, some of us have to be the trusty #2 in life, now fetch me that pen over there...
[Reply]
rico 09:21 PM 07-23-2012
The chiefscrowd thread is littered with a Cassel apologist or two now. Un....farking.....believable. Do these ass-goblins even watch the games?!
[Reply]
NJChiefsFan 01:22 AM 07-24-2012
Originally Posted by splatbass:
That was the intended receiver. He never looked at anyone else. That was the call.
Are you saying there were no other routes? He can decide the guy was covered and go elsewhere. Now I agree all fan bases act like their play calling is the worst but that doesn't change the fact that Matt can't make decisions well enough to win against good teams. The guy isn't 24 yrs old. This isn't his third yr starting. Thinking there is more info needed to peg the guy is beyond optimistic IMO.

Now loud and over-reacting fan base/media can cause as many issues as quite over-loyal ones. KC is the latter and this issue highlights it IMO.
[Reply]
NJChiefsFan 01:27 AM 07-24-2012
I enjoyed the effort here. What do I care how he spends his time and since the universe didn't fill me in on the official rules on how to live your life I won't judge. That being said I again feel the need to point out that last week go chiefs said "stats are for losers".
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 01:59 PM 07-24-2012
The responses to this are amusing.

Originally Posted by :
Anyway, just because Cassel has struggled in the past against good defenses doesn't mean he will continue to do so.

Things change so much from year to year and he has more weapons now.. Eli Manning led the league w 25 INTs in 2010 next year he is all of a sudden elite.
Originally Posted by :
Cassel's record with a 2-14 team is excellent.

And his passing stats for a team that has been, for his entire tenure here, designed to be a running offense, are not bad either.
Originally Posted by :
you are the lamest "fan" I have ever seen. you buy into this assinine biased one sided "article" where some moron writes hes opinion and finds a stat to back it up.
Originally Posted by :
Cassel does not win when we throw first...we have not been a throw first team since Dick Vermeil...we throw when we are behind and have to abandon the run game...what? your precious article doesnt mention things like that?
Originally Posted by :
IN 2009 Matt Cassel was better then Drew Brees,Aaron Rodgers

In 20010 Matt Cassel was better then Drew Brees,Phillip Rivers,Matt Schab,Tom Brady,Peyton Manning,Jay Cuttler

[Reply]
Sweet Daddy Hate 03:28 PM 07-24-2012
:-) @ "Time out please, I am very stupid".
[Reply]
Fish 03:50 PM 07-24-2012
Originally Posted by Toad King:
The responses to this are amusing.
Originally Posted by :
where some moron writes hes opinion and finds a stat to back it up.
How dare you.....
[Reply]
the Talking Can 04:01 PM 07-24-2012
Originally Posted by Toad King:

Whee!


this is the only play one needs to understand what a piece of shit Cassel is....

the only thought in his head is "going to poop my pants, but pawnsmoker will still blow me tonight....going to poop my pants, but pawnsmoker will still blow me tonight...going to poop my pants, but pawnsmoker will still blow me tonight...going to poop my pants, but pawnsmoker will still blow me tonight...going to poop my pants, but pawnsmoker will still blow me tonight...going to poop my pants, but pawnsmoker will still blow me tonight...oops, int...oh well, got paid"
[Reply]
rico 04:30 PM 07-24-2012
Originally Posted by Toad King:
The responses to this are amusing.
I read all those. What on earth can make a group of people so delusional?
[Reply]
Hammock Parties 04:35 PM 07-24-2012
That was in a 10-7 game, too.

On third and 11.

At the start of the third quarter.

The funny thing is after that play we went super conservative on offense, which eventually resulted in the failed 4th and 1.

So yeah, Cassel is the root of all evil.
[Reply]
Three7s 05:17 PM 07-24-2012
Originally Posted by rico:
The chiefscrowd thread is littered with a Cassel apologist or two now. Un....farking.....believable. Do these ass-goblins even watch the games?!
There's a reason I almost never post there anymore. They will think up every possible excuse known to man for defending Cassel.
[Reply]
themanwithnoname 06:34 PM 07-24-2012
I still want someone to print this off and get Cassel to sign it.
[Reply]
rico 06:41 PM 07-24-2012
Originally Posted by Three7s:
There's a reason I almost never post there anymore. They will think up every possible excuse known to man for defending Cassel.
Is that place home base for the Cassel apologists?


Originally Posted by themanwithnoname:
I still want someone to print this off and get Cassel to sign it.
I was thinking about this last night. If someone asked for his autograph at training camp and requested that he signed it, "Matt Cassel 3:16," I wonder if he'd get it...?


I read a comment somewhere, where a guy wrote that he lives in the same neighborhood as Cassel and that he sees him out running all the time. He said something along the lines of "ahh, I hate the guy as a QB because he sucks, but man he's a nice guy...will always say 'hello'" when he sees you in the neighborhood." My first thought was, "how on earth does he rack up the courage to run outside?" Is he blissfully unaware of the extent at which some fans despise him right now? He probably doesn't get on the net much. Lord knows if I were him and read some of this....I would be agoraphobic.
[Reply]
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