So, I work on the 2nd floor of an office complex in Wichita. The 2nd floor has business's like insurance, investment, energy, etc. The 3rd floor is primarily for hair salons, massage therapy, photography, and the like.
Right above my office, there is a hair salon that I go to out of sheer convenience. Earlier today, I hear music blaring above me - fkg rap - and I can't figure wtf is going on. I let it play out for about 10 minutes and then it just starts to fkn annoy me. I'm trying to have a phone conversation and I'm hearing Lil Whayne in the background:-)
Anyhoo, I walk up to the 3rd floor salon, and there are no lights on. Initially, I thought maybe they might have some construction workers doing something for them, since they are closed on Monday's - but, where's the lights?. I knock on the door - no answer. I then proceed to walk in and turn the corner to the salon area. And then, I see it. There is a woman, buck naked, blowing a guy in a barber chair. The dude makes eye contact with me.
ChiTown "Uhh, sorry bout that".
Dude: "Uuh, Uuh, babe" (and points at me)
Chick (turning around to see what it is): "F*&^!" (and makes some guttural shrieking noise, while trying to cover herself up)
That's the some total of that conversation. Ok, here's where it get's weird.
A. Fkg lock the gdamn door next time you dumbfug's
B. Chick = Owner of the Salon
C. Dude does not equal her husband, whom I have met before
D. Chick = Gal who cuts my hair
E. I have an appointment with her to cut my hair on Friday:-)
Before you ask, yes, she has a very nice ass, and a decent set of knockers. I have totally blocked out any image of the man's penis. I need a drink......... [Reply]
WTF is the matter with everyone around you? Your wife called you a liar and burst into tears because some random woman was in your office crying? That is seriously disturbed behavior. [Reply]
On a lighter note, after being gone on a day long work trip, and getting a call 10 minutes before I got home, and giving some people permission to come to our house to see something when I got there.....between bath and bed time...apparently which is a poor decision on my part......I'll let bride owanian read your predicament, and I still might have a chance to score tonight.
have mrschitown create an account and we'll fix her wagon right up for you, pal.
This wasn't the ending I had hoped for you. I hoped for bad jokes, awkward silences, stammering excuses, blushing....and you laughing, which lead to me laughing. [Reply]
Hey Chitown, I may not be Mr. Marriage Guru, but the only way to solve this is to make an appointment with stripper/stylest and then surprise the Mrs with what you have in store, a meeting of the minds with full disclosure. Not only will it make you a good guy, but maybe you'll get a 3way out of it.
Or an icepick to the neck.
Best wishes. [Reply]
SHIT Chitown. Hopefully shit blows over with your wife. Seriously. I'd hate for something bad to come of this. Bad jokes and awkward silence would have been better. [Reply]
Originally Posted by Mr. Plow:
I've never understood that about my wife. Nobody wants a balding 31 year old man with 4 kids and a beer belly. Well, my friends slut girlfriend does, but other than that.
I had a chance to CALMLY talk with her as to what happened. She actually just listened vs trying to assume a bunch of shit. Apparently, this week, one of the teachers she works with just found out her husband was cheating on her (not with my ex-hairdresser, heh). Obviously, my office encounter fed right in to her cheating husband story she had heard early in the week. BTW, the speed dial to the Lawyer was just a joke on my part. It seemed apropos, at the time, given the absolute abortion of a situation I was in. Sorry for the confusion.
